AN OPEN LETTER TO THE "I JUST WANT TO TALK" PERSON
I'm tired of hearing people tell me how badly they need to ACTUALLY SPEAK ENGLISH to keep from getting rusty, how they miss being able to ACTUALLY SPEAK ENGLISH, how they love the idea of ACTUALLY SPEAKING ENGLISH, and what a shame it is that they hardly ever get to practice their English by ACTUALLY SPEAKING IT, and then watching them clam up and look for excuses the minute they are given an opportunity to do exactly that.
Listen, dumbass. There's a person not two feet away from you who wants nothing more than to talk to you. In English. Their English is just as bad as yours. Neither of you needs to feel ashamed. Myself, I'm happy to pretend like I can't hear you. What else can you ask for?
Don't tell me how much you'd love to talk. Talk.